Community Connector Paul Muñiz brings a sociologist’s perspective, a passion for building relationships, and plenty of curiosity to UUCWC.
By Scott Cullen, CrossCurrents Editor
When Paul Muñiz began his new role as UUCWC’s first Community Connector in August, he stepped into a position that is still intentionally taking shape. His goal is to strengthen relationships, identify gaps that hinder connection, and create new pathways for engagement within the congregation and the wider community.
Paul, a sociologist with a PhD from Cornell University, has researched homelessness, poverty, and segregation and has founded Coquí Insight Project, a nonprofit focused on yoga, meditation, health, and wellness. Yet it was UUCWC’s existing sense of community and the potential to strengthen those connections that made the Community Connector position particularly appealing.
“The kinds of things that happen outside the walls of that building are tremendous,” Paul said. “And I understand the power and leverage of social capital. It’s one of those things where, if I can help a community I’m already in line with be healthy, I can make so much more happen than I could on my own.”
A Community That Already Feels Like a Community
At the time of our interview, Paul had met staff members, board members, and others involved in church leadership, but had not yet met most of the congregation. Still, he had already formed an initial impression. “It seems to me that the defining feature is that it’s actually a community,” he said.
That may sound obvious, but Paul doesn’t think genuine community can be taken for granted, particularly after the disruptions of the COVID years and amid broader changes in how people interact with one another.
He recalled walking into the sanctuary and hearing Rev. Kim’s stories about the building and the people who had contributed to it over the years.
“There’s investment, there’s sweat equity, there’s blood and love and death and birth and all of that in this space in a way that we really don’t see too often,” he said. “And it’s just the depth of investment that makes me excited because of what’s already present in this space.”
Paul expects to be at UUCWC all but one Sunday a month, as well as once a week and at selected evening and weekend events. Because he doesn’t come from a UU background and is new to UUCWC, Paul views his lack of familiarity as an opportunity.
“There’s a huge opportunity to teach me, and that could be anybody—that could be a child, that could be the person who’s been part of the congregation for 40 years,” he said. “What I’m interested in is, what don’t I know?”
Building the Beehive
Ask a sociologist what it means to create community, and you might expect a complicated answer. Paul offers an image instead: a beehive.
“Creating community to me is like creating a beehive,” he said. “We can engineer something synthetically close to it, but can a team of architects or engineers actually create a beehive? And the answer is no. We can get close to it. But what we’re really trying to do is to lay the foundations for the people to create community themselves.”
Paul’s sociology background shapes how he thinks about those connections. Rather than putting himself at the center, he wants to help congregants build relationships among themselves, including connections between newer and younger members and longtime members. “The idea is to foster organic relationships between people such that the beehive functions like a beehive is supposed to.”
Building the Plane While Flying It
Because Community Connector is a new position, there isn’t a decades-old playbook waiting for Paul. “We’re building a plane while flying it, and we have no idea where we’re going,” he said, quickly adding a qualification. “I mean, we have some idea where we’re going. We know we’re heading northwest, but to where, it’s really undetermined.”
The broad goals are clear, but exactly how to accomplish them will evolve as Paul gets to know the congregation. That means his first job isn’t arriving with a list of programs. It’s listening.
“It’s really a question of where we are now and where we want to be,” Paul said. “And I mean that in the deepest experiential way. The room might look a certain way to me, might feel a certain way to me, but the experience can be completely different for somebody else.”
Creating Reasons to Connect
Paul believes people in general have become less comfortable with social interaction. “In general, in our society at large, we’re kind of living in a world where, if community were a dance, more people have two left feet than in past generations,” he said. “The trick is not only getting people out on the dance floor but also teaching them how to dance while they’re dancing.”
That means creating environments where people feel comfortable interacting with those they might not ordinarily approach and knowing “that if they don’t get it 100% right, it’s okay.”
Paul also recognizes that people want different levels of involvement. The challenge isn’t convincing everyone to participate equally, but providing meaningful opportunities for people to connect whenever they want.
Paul recognizes that new ideas must be balanced with traditions that congregants cherish. That, too, begins with listening and building trust. “How do we keep the things that people hold dear while not making ourselves archaic while the world is moving forward at a million miles an hour?”
Families, Children, and Low-Stakes Fun
Paul is particularly interested in strengthening connections among children and families, with an emphasis on the interpersonal skills children need in an increasingly digital world. “They need those soft skills,” he said. “They need the ability to find compassion in a world where most of their interactions are with screens and computers.”
He also wants to create opportunities for families to connect through simple, low-stakes activities where the emphasis is as much on having fun together as on programming. That doesn’t necessarily require elaborate programming. Sometimes a simple, fun activity may be exactly what is needed. One activity might be family video-game gatherings.
What Will Success Look Like?
The Community Connector job description includes measurable goals such as participation, engagement, and retention. However, Paul believes numbers tell only part of the story. “There are two ways to look at it,” he said. “There’s the sociology nerd in me who wants to map things out and have quantitative metrics.” Ultimately, he added, “it’s about a feeling.”
One sign of success would be greater interaction among people who might not ordinarily connect, such as a longtime member talking with a young adult. And those interactions don’t always have to be harmonious.
Paul would even consider some disagreement a sign that connections are strengthening. “I think in a lot of cases, tense conversations are better than avoidance.”
If people who normally wouldn’t interact find themselves debating an issue over coffee on a Tuesday night, the disagreement itself may demonstrate that barriers are coming down. “Those are the sorts of things that make me feel like I’m adding to community,” he said. “And it’s a tricky measure because it’s one, qualitative, but two, it’s not always going to be good.”
And when asked what he hopes people will be saying about UUCWC a year from now that they aren’t saying today, Paul replied, “That it’s bigger and there are more children.”
Beyond the Job
When not fulfilling his Community Connector duties, Paul practices and teaches yoga through his nonprofit and spends time with his two pit bull mixes, both of which are training to become therapy dogs.
A former Muay Thai kickboxer, he now trains in jiu-jitsu on weekends. “I wasn’t such a good fighter,” he joked. “I tell people all the time that this face is very pretty for the number of times it’s been punched.”
He also spends as much time as possible with family and friends. “It’s a simple life that keeps me very, very busy,” he said.
Continuing Education
Paul knows he has a lot to learn about UUCWC and wants congregants to help teach him. Most importantly, he doesn’t want anyone to think the Community Connector will be administering “community” from behind a desk.
“I want them to know that I’m an interactive component of this whole thing,” Paul said. “My job isn’t to be an administrator. My job isn’t to be pie in the sky. My job is to be there for the community to serve it.”
He concluded, “I’m at your disposal. That’s my job—to make you feel at home and to do my best to accomplish that goal.”