Creating Covenants

by Clare O’Brien Doyle, Right Relations Committee

“The purpose of the Right Relations Committee is to help restore harmonious relationships.”

Each year the Right Relations Committee (RRC) welcomes two new members who will serve for three years. Bud Johnson and I recently joined Karen DiGeorgio, Chris Marietti, Ben Thornton and Susan Colket as part of the RRC. Because the Right Relations Committee runs mostly in the background of the congregation, our goal is to become a more visible presence in UUCWC life. Sharing our ideas and our work in CrossCurrents is one way to do this.

During the month of October, the concept of creating Covenants was raised several times. Rev. Kim shared her thoughts in her October 21 sermon. Marianne Alt wrote of Covenants in her excellent piece in a previous CrossCurrents. Barbara Jensen related her moving account of how her family got through her medical crisis by establishing a Covenant. At our most recent RRC monthly meeting, we began to explore creating Covenants on all levels of the Congregation. The idea of beginning with each of us creating our own personal Covenant arose. This process of exploring how we want to be with ourselves, thereby creating a template for how we are in the larger world, is a challenging one.

I began thinking about this by asking myself some questions.

  • How do I think about myself?
  • How do I talk to myself and what kind of language do I use?
  • What can I expect of myself?
  • How do I express my needs to others I am in relationship with?
  • How do I listen to others needs?
  • How do I deal with hurt feelings?
  • How do I access and allow my creativity to flourish?
  • What do I do to show love to myself?
  • How do I hold myself accountable?

I am sure there are many other concepts to consider in this endeavor and your questions and process may be very different from mine. However, considering this idea of a Personal Covenant is a good place to start.